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Let me guess You're staring at the upcoming end of the semester.
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You're wondering if you've done enough.
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You've worked long hours, you've had hard conversations and you've had some nights where you've tossed and turned, worrying about situations or students on campus.
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But now, as you reflect on the years so far, you find yourself asking have I really made an impact?
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It's a tough feeling, right, and I don't think that it's an uncommon question.
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But here's the thing most of us overlook your magic as a school counselor doesn't lie in these big, sweeping, grand gestures.
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It's not about solving everybody's problems or hitting every target.
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The real power of your work is in the small, quiet moments, the ones that often go unnoticed but ripple through your students' lives in ways that you may never even see.
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Today, on the podcast, I want to talk about why those small moments matter so much, why your brain is hardwired to overlook them, and how practicing gratitude can help you reconnect with your purpose.
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So if you're feeling unseen, undervalued or just straight up exhausted, I'm with you, and this is an episode you are not going to want to miss, because we need to find the meaning behind your work.
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It matters more than you think.
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Welcome back, my friend, to the School for School Counselors podcast.
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I'm Steph Johnson, your host, a full-time school counselor just like you, on a mission to make school counseling more sustainable and more enjoyable, because you yes you you deserve support, validation and empowerment on the regular, and through this podcast and our School for School Counselors community, we seek to bridge the gap between what grad school taught you and what's really going on on your campus.
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My goal is to help you feel competent, connected and inspired to make a difference, even if you are working in a super challenging school.
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Hey, before we jump into today's topic, I want to take a moment to share a wonderful review from one of our listeners, sb8515, who said I listened to this podcast throughout my internship and into my new career as an elementary school counselor.
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I find it to be uplifting, educational and relevant to the field of school counseling.
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Educational and relevant to the field of school counseling.
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It is an overwhelming job, but each time I listen to an episode, I feel empowered to go to work and make change in my school and in my community.
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I would recommend this podcast and have to many co-workers and colleagues.
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Keep up the good work.
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Thank you so much, sb8515.
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Reviews like that remind me why I do what I do and I'm so grateful for each and every person who listens to this podcast, but also to those who support it.
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So if you haven't yet, could you hit pause and go leave a rating or review in your podcast player so that we can help get the word out about this podcast to support and empower even more of our colleagues, because y'all, that's what this is all about.
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All right, so getting back to the topic at hand, let me tell you about a student we had on our campus once.
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They had a name that everybody knew.
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Even if those people weren't connected to that student's grade, everybody knew them.
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They had a reputation around campus and we worked so hard to make progress with the student Daily check-ins, behavior plans, individual counseling, small group counseling, everything we could think of and just as we started to see some glimmers of change, the student moved, student moved.
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I felt so defeated, I'll be honest.
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I just really felt down about it.
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All this time and intentionality poured into the student, hoping to see some returns before they left our campus.
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And then one day, suddenly they were gone and I had to really remind myself.
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I had to really remind myself.
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Our brains are wired to focus on the negative.
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Research by Baumeister and colleagues shows that bad experiences stick with us longer than the good ones.
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And so on my campus, when this student left us, we were so caught up in what hadn't gone right and all of the things left undone that we missed the small victories.
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We overlooked the trust that we built with not only the student but the parent.
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We overlooked the moments that we helped that student feel seen and feel heard.
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Y'all those moments matter, even if we don't get to the end result that we're anticipating.
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These moments are like seeds they get planted in the soil and we may never see them grow, but they're there and they're waiting for the right conditions when they can just be completely, begin to flourish.
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That's why we do what we do right.
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So let's talk about gratitude, and I'm not talking about the surface level gratitude conversation you hear most everywhere else, where you list a few things you're thankful for and then you call it a day.
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Real gratitude and real gratitude practices rewire your brain and studies show that gratitude journaling for just five minutes a day can increase your happiness levels by 10%.
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Y'all that is statistically significant in terms of your emotional well-being, but it doesn't stop there.
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Gratitude activates the brain's reward system.
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When you engage in gratitude, dopamine and serotonin start flowing, and those are those feel-good chemicals that we all need.
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And even more, gratitude strengthens the ventromedial prefrontal cortex.
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Say that three times fast.
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That's the part of your brain that's tied to empathy and prosocial behavior, brain that's tied to empathy and pro-social behavior.
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So really intentional gratitude makes you kinder, more resilient and more connected, and really, at the end of the day, isn't that what we all want as school counselors?
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So how do you make gratitude work for you?
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How do we go beyond just the simple list, three things you're grateful for every day?
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Yeah, man, that didn't help.
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That didn't really change anything for me.
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It just gave me something else to do.
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You ever felt like that?
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Let me introduce you to an idea called gratitude expansion.
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It is so simple, but also extremely powerful.
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First you start with a small win.
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Let's say, a student who has been very reluctant to work with you has finally started to open up, write it down and then expand it.
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What made that moment possible?
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Was it your consistency in checking in with them every day?
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Was it your empathy?
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Was it your determination to not let them ruffle your feathers every time they brushed you off?
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What was it?
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And then next?
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What was it?
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And then next?
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What ripple effect could that have?
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Maybe that moment of trust will help them open up to others in the future.
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Who knows, right?
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But by expanding your gratitude, you're not just acknowledging a single moment, you're looking into its deeper meaning and impact.
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Yo, this is important.
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This is the missing link of this gratitude conversation that no one talks about.
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So take a moment, think about one small win that you've had sometime this semester.
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Was it a breakthrough with a student, a resolved conflict with a parent, or maybe some sort of teeny, tiny, incremental change in behavior for a student?
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And then ask yourself what does this say about your strengths as a school counselor?
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Because it's okay to pat yourself on the back, we need it every now and again.
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And then further, how might that moment ripple into the future?
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So you see, these reflections aren't just about making ourselves feel good, and they're not just about archiving one single good moment in time.
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They're about reminding yourself why your work matters, especially when the big picture feels so stinking, overwhelming.
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That's why we're talking about it at this time of year, when we have all the transcripts that need to be reviewed, when we have the end of semester grades, all of the big tests.
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Students are stressed, we have special events, so our schedules are all off kilter.
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It's harder to find kids for counseling.
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We're going to need something to really ground us and remind us of our purpose and why we do what we do.
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So here's my challenge to you Commit to a daily gratitude practice.
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It does not need to be fancy, it doesn't need to be a journal.
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It could be a sticky note, it could be a voice memo in your phone that's what I use or a section in your planner.
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If you have our School for School Counselors planner, you know there's a spot at the bottom of each day to record information, just like this.
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But when you write it down or record it, however you choose to honor that moment, don't just list it.
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Expand it, add the why of it, add the what, if and as you're starting this gratitude practice, if you're feeling overwhelmed and you're like Steph, there is no way that I'm going to be able to add one more thing to my day.
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Are you joking right now?
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Remember that you can start small.
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Your gratitude might be.
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I showed up today.
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I showed up and I did the work.
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I listened to a podcast so I could learn and grow as a professional.
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Those are victories too.
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So if you're in that horrible place where not only are you feeling overwhelmed, but you're feeling beaten down, you're feeling demoralized, perhaps you're starting to think about if this is burnout or not.
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Start small, find those moments to be grateful for, look for the whys and the what could happens because of it, and don't forget to pat yourself on the back, because when the semester ends, I want you to feel proud, and I don't want you to just feel proud of these big accomplishments.
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I want you to be proud of the seeds you've been planting all along the way.
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When you feel like you're just treading water, the small quiet moments sometimes combine together to create the biggest waves.
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You are amazing for showing up every day waves.
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You are amazing for showing up every day, for continuing to raise your hand and saying give me the worst you got, I'll take that.
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Let me take that on day after day.
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Let me get beaten down sometimes beaten up right.
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Let me take on the people who don't want to talk to me for whatever reason.
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Let me continue to show up for them.
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Let me continue giving empathy.
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Let me continue devising ways to help everyone around me grow and become better citizens.
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Let me do that job.
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Is it hard?
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Yes, is it lonely?
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Absolutely it is, and you keep showing up every day to do that work.
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Do you know how incredible that makes you?
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Ah, it's just phenomenal, and I am so honored and humbled that you spent this time with me in this podcast episode.
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Hey, if this episode resonated with you, please share it with a fellow counselor.
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Let's spread support, let's spread validation and empowerment, because y'all, we are all in this school counseling thing together.
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I'll be back soon with another episode of the School for School Counselors podcast.
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In the meantime, I hope you have the best week, take care of yourself during this sprint to the end of the semester, and I'll be back with you soon.
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You got this.